Tuesday, May 01, 2007

"You're cursed Jack..."

"... Everything you touch, in one way or another ends up dead."

And SecDef Heller is saying that like it's a bad thing?! If you're job is national security for a sooper-sekret covert agency, then that's a very good thing. Terrorists have a tendency to turn up dead when you send Jack Bauer after them.

Of course the down side is that Jack goes through wives and girlfriends rather quickly. And the downside for Kim Bauer fans is that she always has these near death experiences; at least two a season for the seasons she's been a part of. Whether it mountain lions or Edgar-eating toxic gas, Kim always narrowly escapes death.

But that makes us here at Cake or Death wonder, did Jack pass this grim reaper-like quality on to his daughter? We believe he did, only she can't control it. Where Jack is like the grim reaper or Chuck Norris, killing at will, Kim is like the plague, death simply wipes out everything in her wake. Her mom? Dead. Chase? Lost his arm, probably dead. New psycho-babble boyfriend from last season? I'm sure he's OD'd by now. Jack even had to fake his death to get away from her.

So while this may be bad for Kim Bauer fans everywhere, at least it's an excuse to try to convince 24 writers to bring back Kim next season as the ultimate WMD. Oh, and it's an excuse to put up a nice little pic too...

So while you enjoy Kim, enjoy this week's Jack Bauer Moment of ZenTM:

Chuck Norris Jack Bauer doesn't have to wait 30 minutes after a big meal to go swimming. He can swim whenever he wants.

The tighter the jeans on Chuck Norris Jack Bauer, the more kick ass he becomes.

Chuck Norris Jack Bauer actually speaks three languages: English, Pain, and Death. He is currently working on a fourth language, Dismemberment, and is doing quite well.

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